Pure Page 11

  In the center of the table, display screens were angled in a circle so each person could see one. Rylant’s assistants each positioned a small camera — one aimed toward me and the other toward Elyle.

  I wanted to turn from the camera. I always hated being watched. Yet in order to see the screen I had to keep my head up. They had thought of everything.

  The display screen flashed and I saw Dad seated in a high-back metal chair with armrests. Two wide black straps across his chest and stomach restrained him. More straps fixed each arm to an armrest. The room was all white. A truth machine beside him flashed blue lights. A familiar helmet, like the one I’d worn earlier, was on his head. From what I could see through the face cover, he looked tired and old. His skin was hanging more loosely under his eyes, and he had the stubble of a beard. His eyes glared ahead at something unseen. His fingers gripped the ends of the armrests. He was wearing the orange uniform of Detention Block. Prison gear.

  I wanted to leap up and free Dad somehow. Then I heard Rylant’s gravelly voice talking from the recording.

  Rylant: You’ve been interrogated recently about lifewort?

  Dad: I’ve nothing to hide. Lifewort was approved by Purity.

  A loud bleep sounded from the machine and the lights blinked red.

  Rylant: Answer with a yes or no, please.

  Dad (sighing): Yes.

  Blue lights.

  Rylant: I’ve reviewed that interrogation. What I’m wondering now is, were you aware of lifewort’s invasive nature before its release?

  Dad: It’s not invasive. It’s doing what it was designed to do. It was made to resist drought, salt water, heat, freezing, insects, viruses, bacteria, and herbicides.

  The bleep came again, loud and harsh. Red lights cast a glow over him.

  Rylant (firmly): Answer yes or no. Were you aware of lifewort’s invasive nature before its release?

  Dad (frustrated):Yes.

  Blue lights.

  Rylant: I understand that lifewort was made to be so invasive to improve the yield?

  Dad: Yes.

  Blue lights.

  Rylant: Was it necessary for lifewort to be so invasive, just to increase the yield?

  Dad (monotone):Yes.

  Blue lights.

  Rylant: Were you aware that a resistant plant like lifewort could become invasive?

  Dad: Yes.

  Blue lights.

  “Why are you showing me this?” I asked. “This has nothing to do with me.”

  The questions were so confusing and repetitive, as if she were trying to trick Dad. I hated to see it.

  “You were instructed to listen and watch,” Rylant said, her voice cold.

  I sighed, glancing at Elyle. Her eyes were shiny and her hands were gripped tightly together in her lap. She gave me a weak smile then turned away, her chin trembling. I’d never seen Elyle so distraught. What was going on? I stared at the screen again.

  Rylant: You used standard issue genetic equipment to create lifewort?

  Dad: Yes.

  Blue lights.

  Rylant: And this included geneblasters, growth centers, and false wombs?

  Dad: Yes.

  Blue lights.

  Rylant: So, in fact, this equipment could be used to genetically alter a human?

  Dad (suddenly flustered): Yes, I mean no. GrowTech wouldn’t do that.

  Red lights.

  Rylant (ignoring the red lights): The DNA tests show that your daughter, Lenni Hannix, is not a natural construct. Could she have been created in the lab designed for lifewort experiments?

  I gasped. What she’d said couldn’t be true! It was a lie meant to fool Dad. I glanced at Elyle, but she looked down and away. A single tear trickled down her face.

  No, I thought. Elyle, look at me.

  She wouldn’t.

  I stared again at the screen, trying to breathe steadily. Why wouldn’t Elyle look at me?

  Dad (pale and shaking): I have no comment.

  He didn’t deny it. Impossible. It was a mistake. My face grew hotter. I felt I would faint or burst apart. My fingers gripped the chair. I didn’t dare look at Elyle now.

  There was a break in the recording. It had been edited. Dad appeared again, looking even more haggard. The helmet from the truth machine had been removed. He was slouched in a chair. What had Rylant done to him? I wanted to reach out and make her stop, to comfort Dad, to hear him say how I was pure.

  Dad: Every decision we make is a gamble. No one can predict what will happen when we roll the dice with Mother Nature. Without science we would still be living in caves.

  Rylant: Go on.

  Dad: I don’t regret what Mara and I did. Not one bit. Sure, Lenni was made to measure. If any father could guarantee that his child would grow up to be perfectly healthy, or smart, or maybe just a bit better looking, wouldn’t he? At GrowTech we were already working with plant DNA. What was one small experiment with human DNA?

  No, Dad, I thought. Please don’t say it.

  But he kept talking.

  Dad (proudly): We protected our work. We avoided detection. We got her past the routine screening for health benefits and insurance by substituting naturally cultivated DNA. We tried to shield her from all this. Guess it didn’t work.

  Was I just one of his experiments, like lifewort, another weed to be destroyed? I rubbed my face, trying desperately to clear my thoughts, to sort this mess out. How could Dad do this to me?

  Rylant (still off-screen): What about Elyle Brahan? Was she involved in any way?

  I glanced at Elyle, accusingly. She was the only person in the room I could blame. Yet her face was so tight with anxiety that I couldn’t hold my anger against her.

  Dad: No. She knew about it, sure, but she didn’t join our family until after Lenni was born. Until my wife became ill. My wife was always nervous that Lenni would be discovered somehow.

  “Oh, Lenni,” Elyle whispered, gripping my arm. “I wanted to protect you from this.”

  I shook my head. “Don’t say it, Elyle,” I begged. “Don’t tell me it’s true.”

  “I would have told you,” she said, “but we thought you were safer if you didn’t know.” Tears streamed down her face now.

  “No!” I pulled my arm away.

  Rylant: And the people at GrowTech. Who was involved?

  Dad (grim): They were following my directions. I am responsible.

  Rylant (sounding triumphant): We’ll need their names.

  The screen flickered and went black. Was this really happening? I wanted to deny Dad’s words, yet I knew inside that I was hearing the horrible truth. This was why Mother was always so protective of me. This was why she panicked when Purity came to the door. This was why she was sick with anxiety. This was why Elyle gave me the waterstone — to try to protect me from Purity. A sob rose in my throat, gagging me. Before I could get control, Mother appeared on the screen. Unlike Dad, Mother was lying in a bed with no truth machine in sight. Her head lolled to one side against a white pillow, and her arms lay flat under a pale blue blanket as if they were strapped down.

  Rylant (off-screen): Your husband, Leonard Hannix, has admitted to genetically engineering your daughter, Lenni. We know you were involved. What do you want to tell us?

  Mother didn’t move, didn’t respond in any way. I sensed she was at the end of a long struggle, and I hated to see it. I may have wished to overcome her controlling nature many times, but I never wanted to see her shattered.

  Finally, her cracked lips began to move. Someone’s hand appeared, squirting water into her mouth. Mother opened and shut her mouth as if testing to see if her jaw still worked. When she spoke, her voice was deeper, rougher, even than Rylant’s.

  Mother: I desperately wanted a child. We tried for years, but (a long sniff) I just wasn’t able to. Leonard thought of GrowTech, his company. It was his idea. No romance. Just geneblasters, microscopes, and a false womb. We could have just gotten help with conception at a clinic. Then everything would ha
ve been legal. But the lure of gen-eng was too much for us. Both Leonard and I knew we would do it. He wanted a boy, of course, but I insisted on a girl. We almost separated over that, so I let him name her Lenni, after himself. We wanted her to be perfect. Tall and beautiful. Athletic and smart. Creative and sensitive. No diseases. High quality. But Leonard — he had a few undesirable traits in his family that might have come through in spite of the gen-eng. I didn’t truly trust the science, so I had to take control. I had to get a better specimen to be Lenni’s biological father. Lenni couldn’t pick her own genes, so I did it for her. She’ll thank me for that.

  “What is she saying?” I had to interrupt. This was too much.

  Rylant froze the screen.

  “What do you think she is saying?” Rylant raised her eyebrows.

  “I… I don’t know.”

  Rylant ignored me. “Elyle, do you have any knowledge of Mara Hannix’s actions?”

  Elyle shook her head. “I was not involved.”

  “Yes, my sources confirm that.” Rylant turned back to me, so smug, so satisfied. “Leonard is not your biological father. Your mother introduced another specimen into the mix, which we have yet to identify. But we will.”

  My head started pounding. I hugged myself and began to rock back and forth. Mother had arranged it all? She had chosen who I was? How I looked, how I acted, my gender, my personality? She controlled everything? And Dad was not my father?

  “You may leave, Elyle, once the medics clear you for release.” Rylant stood up and nodded at her assistants. “Lenni’s parents will remain in Detention Block until sentencing. Lenni, you’ll stay under guard until further notice.” She stared down at me. “You’ll be reclassified once we’ve examined you more thoroughly.”

  Reclassified? I thought of Redge’s horror stories and began to shake. What would happen to me?

  Someone put a hand on my shoulder but I shrugged it off. Elyle? Doctor Frank? I didn’t care. I slumped over onto the hard, black table and crushed my palms into my eyes. I wanted to scream, to run away, to cry forever, but I’d never have enough tears for this much sorrow.

  Oh, Mur, I called out. Who am I?

  Yet Rylant had clearly told me.

  I was skidge.

  a visitor

  The dream, my first since the nightmare of fire, left me sickened and shaking with loathing. In this dream, I’d held my arms outstretched, palms down, for hours, days maybe, until they ached from the strain. Holding them flat while Mother dug and poked, raked and tilled. I’d simply watched as she inserted tiny seeds into the holes she had made up and down my arms. Just hold still, Lenni, Mother had said, and I hadn’t budged. For some reason, I’d placidly allowed her to plant along my arms, and I’d held them rigid as the plants grew, binding themselves painfully into my flesh, growing roots like tentacles along my veins. Until Mother began to harvest, twisting off a ripe tomato-like fruit and offering me a bite. When I shook my head, Mother smiled and bit into it herself. Her teeth were pointed like daggers. Sweet-scented pulp from the fruit splattered Mother’s face and glasses. Delicious! She moaned as she wiped her glasses with the back of her hand, only managing to smear the juice around.

  I closed my eyes and rolled against the wall, exhausted and repulsed. Even in sleep, I couldn’t hide from the horror. My parents had betrayed me. I was robbed of my self.

  For days, I’d hardly set foot on the cold hospital floor, except for washroom trips and medical tests, during which I was followed by my ever-diligent guard. I’d stayed huddled in bed, unable to move, my thoughts more tormenting than Rylant had ever been. Strangely, Redge and Elyle were permitted to see me, although they were no comfort. Redge had said they were listening to us, gathering information about who else might have been involved. I didn’t care what they heard. I was ruined, utterly ruined.

  Shivering with fever, I pulled the thin blanket up and dragged the pillow down over my head, as if it could barricade me from the hideous truth. Mother and the man who was no longer my father had chosen me, decided who I would be, how I would act. Did they think I’d be happier? I wasn’t. Improved? I wasn’t.

  One question remained unanswered. Who was I supposed to be? Underneath all their programming, their interference, who was I? I’d never know.

  How dare they? I’d never forgive my parents. I pushed the pillow aside and glared at the ceiling, wanting to do them damage. Throttle the man who was not my father. Strangle Mother twice.

  Maybe I shouldn’t have saved Elyle, I thought. Maybe I should’ve let her stay in that gray place with the winding river. Then none of this would have happened.

  Yet I was the one who’d pushed her down the stairs. I’d made her fall. Either I’d had a responsibility to save her, or I was no better than my parents. I’d manipulated Elyle the way my parents had manipulated me, just because I’d pushed her. Because I’d felt guilty. Because I’d wanted her back. What gave me the right? What gave Purity the right?

  I wanted to wrench the seizure-control device from the back of my neck. I wanted to wrench all my parents’ alterations out of my body. I wanted to become myself.

  I would choose seizures. I would choose a defective brain, a frail body, and a substandard personality. If I could, I would choose myself— whoever I was — however imperfect.

  “Lenni Hannix?” A business-like female voice from the distant medical station intruded, reinforcing the constant lurking presence of Purity.

  “Yes?”

  “You have a visitor. Shall I send him down?” the disembodied voice asked.

  A visitor! Mother and Leonard were in Detention. Redge and Elyle wouldn’t announce themselves. Could it finally be Jonah? And Purity would permit it? I didn’t dare ask.

  “Uh, give me five minutes.”

  “Five minutes, then.”

  I scrambled into a new gown, wishing impossibly for some decent clothes. But humiliation was one of Purity’s weapons, so I just combed my hair into a ponytail and opened the door for my visitor. Five minutes later, Jonah squeezed past my attentive guard.

  “Jonah!” I breathed his name, like a secret too precious to speak aloud.

  I’d so hoped it would be him. I smoothed down my hair once more, hoping I didn’t look sick. Jonah was here. Finally. He would help. He always did.

  Jonah smiled with only one corner of his mouth. Strange, I thought, yet I didn’t dwell on it. His lips quickly distracted me, magnificently chiseled into his bronze skin. His golden-brown eyes, his thick brown hair — I had forgotten how startlingly beautiful he was.

  “Whew!” He glanced nervously behind him. “I had to go through a full ID scan to get in here. And they say I have to go through cleansing to get out!”

  Jonah would endure cleansing for me! “You came through that? I hope it’s not too terrible on the way out.”

  I closed the door to the guard, who had turned to watch us suspiciously, then bounded into Jonah’s arms. Familiar warmth filled me. I nestled against his chest and rubbed one hand through his silken hair, aching with the pleasure of being next to him.

  “I missed you,” I said, trying to forget that Rylant might be listening in hopes of uncovering more details about me.

  Jonah wrapped his arms around my waist and swung me from side to side. Then he buried his face in my hair. “Me, too.”

  Yet something about the way he held me was different. Maybe he wasn’t gripping me as close. I couldn’t pinpoint it.

  Then Jonah held me back, examining my face. “How are you, Lenni?”

  “I’m fine. Oh, Jonah, I’m so sorry about the expulsion. It’s all my fault.”

  “No, it isn’t.”

  “Yes, it is. My mother did it. She complained to the Academy.”

  “One complaint couldn’t have gotten me expelled.” His voice was tense; his jaw clenched. “Someone else had to be involved.”

  “You don’t know Mother.”

  Jonah stepped away, turning sideways. He fiddled with my stylus on the side table. Wa
s he mad at me?

  “I tried to stop her,” I began, but he shook his head.

  “The expulsion.” He frowned. “That’s why I’ve come — to tell you about my new school. Lenni, I’ve been on interview at the Academy in Current.”

  “That’s why you didn’t respond to my transmits. But Current?” My heart sank into my stomach.

  “Yes. It’s the closest Purity settlement.”

  Current was also the home of Dumacorp, where Doctor Frank had made Redge. “I know where it is. Two hours away by hovercraft! You got in? Oh, I’ll miss you.”

  I tried to hold Jonah again, but he grabbed my hands, held them between us, and caressed them.

  “Me, too. Are you sure you’re all right, Lenni?”

  He was examining my face. Tilting his head as if a different angle could bring me into focus better. What was he doing?

  Then I understood. He knew I was skidge. He had heard somehow. I didn’t have to tell him.

  “You know?”

  I waited for his sympathy. Jonah would understand how hard this was. He would help me through it. A clutch of tears waited in my throat.

  “About what your parents did to you? It’s on all the news reports. Everyone knows.”

  They all knew. I felt invaded. Other people wouldn’t understand, like Jonah did.

  Jonah began to pace the room. “Listen, Lenni, I can’t do this. Current is just too far. I’ll have to work hard to catch up. I won’t have time to visit.”

  Then, I finally grasped the change in him. The difference in the way he held me. He was saying good-bye. Leaving me. I stared at him, stunned.

  Jonah had always wanted to teach at the Academy. Everything he’d done had been for a posting. Being involved with skidge would hurt his chances. Destroy them, really. Yet he had admired my independence and appreciated my sketches. Couldn’t Jonah, of all people, accept me as I was?